If it was any closer to April 1st I'd think this was an April Fool's Joke!
I did a double take and instantly
wondered if they had meant to say $460.00 in quarters. But no, as I read on
they made it abundantly clear they really did mean $460K. I'm guessing this
even exceeds pocket change for an elephant or even a herd of elephants... Or,
maybe since many elephants lack pockets it should be compared to "Trunk
Change" or not at all...
According to the news report, over a period of just 24 months a "former public works inspector for a New Jersey village" (emphasis mine) took 22,000 lbs. of quarters from the room where the town kept the proceeds from its parking meters. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN WITHOUT SOMEONE NOTICING SOMETHING? Last time I checked, $460,000 is almost half a million dollars! I hope NBC runs a whole series of follow-up stories detailing how this guy pulled this off for two years before getting caught! But wait for it... it gets better.
According to the news report the thief confessed in court to four counts of THIRD DEGREE THEFT. I would have thought it rated a charge of at least second degree theft? I was suspicious so I checked the definition of Third Degree Theft. Now I'll admit that Ask.com is not always a definitive source. But in this case it agrees perfectly with more complex explanations. "...third theft degree is whereby theft is committed on property not exceeding seven hundred and fifty dollars
( http://www.ask.com/question/what-is-3rd-degree-theft).
I was never good at math (or other school subjects) but I'm going out on a limb here and suggesting that even if you multiply $750 times four (the number of charges) it still falls several dollars short of $460,000! What's with just charging the guy with four counts of Third Degree Theft? We'll return to this in a moment... But first I want to flirt with something here that seems even more bizarre.
According to the NBC NEWS report this public works inspector merely deposited the quarters in his BANK ACCOUNT. I have to look up the laws on what banks have to report to law enforcement. But, I gotta tell ya... if over the next two years I showed up at my bank and deposited that many quarters they would have surely thought something was awry. First of all, I don't think banks accept that many quarters unless they're wrapped. So I am going to assume the public works department graciously wrapped these quarters for this clever dude. Otherwise, I simply can't imagine he wrapped 1.8 million quarters... but, hey I can't imagine he was able to steal that many either.
I would have had to tell my local bank manager that I had purchased a really, really big Gumball Machine franchise or I was systematically robbing the children of the town of their piggy bank and Tooth Fairy change... Using my calculator, I figured he had to have taken out 75,000 quarters a month over two years or about $18,750 a week and put at least most of it in his bank account.
Now, as promised, I want to
return to the whole Third Degree Theft charges thing. According to the report,
in addition to seemingly having been found guilty of inadequate charges he
received no (that's correct n-o) jail time! Under a plea agreement he received
just five years probation. I'm thinking' many people get some jail time and
likely nearly as much probation for just shoplifting $460 worth of clothing...
However, and this is important, over this five year period he has to pay back
all the money. Now, to flirt with all the question this brings to my mind I
need a whole new paragraph.
It may not need to be said, but the inspector in question lost his job with the town over this "Third Degree Theft" incident. Yet, now to pay back the money he has to make payments of $2,000 a month over the next five years. I assume that otherwise now being unemployed and maybe having trouble finding work, it would be hard for him to make the payments without selling all of whatever he might have purchased with this little extra "cash."
But wait a minute folks... the news report didn't mention a fine of any sort. So, how much may the his clever inspector have already made in interest over the the past two years as the quarters quickly added up? Someone a lot better than me at financial stuff will have work out how much interest he might have "earned" over two years. But, GEEZ LOUISE - Why didn't the court just order him to turn over most, if not all, of the $460.000 of which he is currently in control? If he is having to pay back the $460.000 with interest accrued, then the payment plan might almost make sense. But not interest was mentioned. Then again, for all I know he may have gambled it all away in Atlantic City?
Actually the news report does say the inspector of quarters will pay the city a lump sum of an undisclosed amount of money up front before starting the five years of monthly payments, which I'm pretty sure only amounts to $120,000. So he won't being paying down the total amount and continuing to drawl interest on such a big, yet slowly declining balance. However, although I'm obviously not a financial genius, I still think this confessed Thief may still be coming out ahead financially. As for his life in general, I think he has already come out way behind...
Stay tuned, I'm really hoping NBC does a follow-up story explaining more details on just HOW this inspector pulled all this off over two years without getting caught... In case you haven't already done the math - according to the news report, he "lifted" 22,000 lbs. in quarters
(http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/new-jersey-official-admits-stealing-460k-quarters-n56981).
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